The Peace which Transcends Understanding

Screech! Thud! Hysterical shrieks....

Although my back was turned to the horror, instantly I knew what had happened even without my eyes seeing. My heart sank as I dropped the phone I was holding, turned and ran to witness my worst nightmare.

My baby. Lying face down on the asphalt, unresponsive, not moving, blood spilling from his nose and mouth. Shoes thrown off. Contorted body.

Panic, confusion. Call 911. Call daddy. Pray, God, please! Brett you will be okay.

In the midst of the first moments of the accident, I was panicked, even hysterical. My mind was not working right and I did not know what to do. But God did, and He provided. Almost instantly help arrived and as it did, so did my peace....a peace that transcends all understanding. For some reason, as bad as that accident was, I was never worried for his life. Even driving away in the ambulance, as Brett was still out cold, deep down I had peace that he would be okay. Some will say it is denial, but over the next two weeks, in the moments when I needed God the most, He showed up.

One in particular I will never forget. The mornings in ICU when Brett was sleeping were the hardest for me. I always thought that after a full nights rest that he would wake in the morning. On the 4th morning without waking, I began to feel very weary. I just wanted to see my baby's eyes and have him stay awake and alert. At that moment, no one could console me. No one could help me. No one had any words that could help my heart, except God. And of course, in that moment a chorus from a song popped into my head. Not a song on my ipod or a song played regularly at church or on the radio. It is just a song that I have sang in church a handful of times, but the melody and the words came into my head at that moment with perfect clarity:

Though I walk through valleys low

I'll fear no evil

By the waters still my soul

My heart will trust in you!

I asked my sister to figure out the artist and download that song for me and I went into the parent's shower room in the ICU unit and cried it out to the Lord. It was exactly what I needed!! It was God telling me not to fear, that He was still in control and just to trust in Him. It instantly gave me the strength and the peace that I needed to continue on. Peace that transends understanding.

I am working on memorizing more scripture this year, and is it any coincidence that my 2 verses for March were the following:

Isaiah 41:10 So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

John 16:33 I have told you these things so that in me you may have PEACE. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.

Gives me chills now reading these....God knew what was on my horizon and he wanted to make sure that I had these verses fresh in my head. Many times over the past weeks, these verses have randomly popped into my head- just the Holy Spirit's way of reminding me that He is strengthening me, holding me up and giving me peace!

Which leads me to want to share with everyone that to call yourself a Christian or to "believe" in Jesus is not enough. Sure, it is probably enough for your salvation, but God offers an abundant life here on Earth. The key to that abundance (like the abundant peace that I experienced in the midst of tragedy) is to walk daily with him, read the Bible, and fellowship with other believers. The closer we are to Jesus, the more able he is to help us when we need to be carried.

Turn to Him.

Fix your eyes on His face.

Trust Him.

He will carry you.